Overheard on the evening news: What started as a pleasant evening ended in death last night. After multiple confrontations, bludgeoning, and beatings, Chivalry was pronounced dead with the slam of a car door.
Police say details are a bit sketchy, but from what they gather, an unassuming young women was to blame for the death of chivalry. Her repeated efforts to open her own doors and pay her own way; her constant insistence on doing everything without assistance; her need to flaunt her independence; all resulted in the simultaneous squashing and suffocation of the aforementioned victim, chivalry. Widespread grief and mourning has been reported all around the nation in response to the loss of such a great and noble character.
Ok, so that story was definitely not heard on the evening news. But...it's a story that probably plays out in my life on a daily basis. Miss Independent is a role that I love playing. I like the feeling that I can do things by myself, whether it's changing a lightbulb or figuring out my taxes, and that I can help others do just about anything too. Need some boxes carried? I can do it. Need some computer help? I can do it. Need some mechanical help? Well, I probably can't do it but I might still try.
I often refute the idea that chivalry is not dead. I complain about the lack of genuine gentlemen at large in the world. But in my quest to be a strong, independent woman (a quest seemingly necessary due to this lack of quality men), I wonder if I don't contribute to the problem. Perhaps I kill the potential inherent in so many by not allowing them to exercise their chivalrous qualities. Perhaps I slow the growth of thoughtfulness and charm each time that I refuse a helping hand from our male counterparts.
Am I one of those girls who ruins it for everybody else? Do I spoil the effects that chivalry could have? Though I claim to be in wistfull waiting for my knight in shining armour, my unknowing attempts to poison his horse may considerably thwart his attempts to reach me. Maybe it's time to let the door be opened for me. Maybe it's time to let the bag be carried for me. Maybe it's time to let the burden be lifted for me. And maybe it's just time to stop defying the wisdom of my friend Kurt who says:
Don't make chivalry difficult.
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You have not killed chivalry nor put it at risk. Don't change Megan. Who you are is who you have been made to be. God has formed you into the independant, skillful, witty, and (sometimes) intimidating woman you have always been...
So much of what I fell for over 5 years ago was your inability to follow the conformity of our society. please don't change from that amazing woman you were.
If you were to start conforming to the world, you would begin to take away from the very things that have made you such an impact in this world. Think of all that God has done through you in the mission work abroad and people you have met. You have seen so much more of this world than most of us ever will. And so much of that is a result of your unwillingness to let someone else do the work or think for you. You answered the call God had in your life back at NPU and you were willing to make a bold move. That would never have taken place if you would have let someone else do your thinking. someone else open your door...
don't change. even if it means you have to wait a bit longer for the right one to come along.
(you remember the promise you made me that first night you and i met?)
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